Yes, for your night owl, jitterbug special we’re featuring the lyrics to one of the greatest country songs of all time (Help Me Jesus Div.), surpassing even such classics as:
“I’m The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised”
“You’re The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly”
“Thank God And Greyhound She’s Gone”
“You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat”
“If Love Were Oil, I’d Be A Quart Low”
“I Wanna Whip Your Cow”
“I Been Roped And Thrown By Jesus In The Holy Ghost”
“I Don’t Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling”
“I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me”
“I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart”
And one of my other personal faves of all time:
“I’m Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life”
With no further ado, here’s the great Bobby Bare classic “Drop Kick Me Jesus” (Words and music by Paul Craft):
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Make me, oh make me, Lord more than I am
Make me a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly tempestion below
I’ve got the will, Lord if you’ve got the toe.
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Take all the brothers who’ve gone on before
And all of the sisters who’ve knocked on your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
Stick’em up front in the offensive line.
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Yeah, Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
***In the photo: That’s Earl “Dutch” Clark, considered the last of the great drop kickers in American football
(From the 
Pro Football Hall of Fame)
