What e’er the soul has felt or suffered long,
Oh, heart! this one thing should not be forgot:
Christ washed the feet of Judas.”— Poet George Marion McClellan
On what the church came to describe as “Holy Thursday” or “Maundy Thursday,”* Jesus and his disciples gathered in the “Upper Room.”
This was right before the awful Friday in which the world poured out its hatred on him–the day before God drenched the hate-filled world in his love.
There in that large room where Jesus broke and shared the bread of his soon-to-be-broken body and the wine of his blood to be shed for them, our Lord took off his robe, wrapped a towel around himself, and washed the feet of those astonished disciples. (Read John 13 here.)
The washing of the feet
Ghislaine Howard (b.1953 )
Methodist Collection of Modern Christian Art
Peter was so freaked out that he wanted to wash the master’s feet, but the humble servant-leader who incarnated the most radical love even known wouldn’t have it. This foot-washing was to be the example for Peter and the boys–and all of us through the ages–to follow in their own servanthood.
Jesus assured Peter that “later you will understand.” Indeed, it was days later, after the agonizing torture, death and resurrection of our Lord, that Peter and the surviving disciples finally understood.
In this act of extravagant love and mercy, Jesus stooped down to wash even the feet of Judas, the man he knew would plant the kiss of death on him.
This was the example he set for them, and, I repeat, for all of us for all times, in commanding us to forgive even the most extreme and seemingly unforgivable hatred of those who trespass against us.
Nobody ever said forgiveness is easy. Nobody ever said forgiving–genuine forgiving– can be done in an instant.
Forgiveness, more often than not, requires a lot of time and processing. In fact, in the most extreme cases of betrayals and sins and atrocities against us, we might have to ask God to do the forgiving for us.
Beating yourself up with guilt for your inability to forgive someone is unhealthy and is not even based on healthy theology. In grief and suffering, bitterness and rage against an enemy is an honest-to-God feeling and by no means a mortal sin against God who feels our pain. The Psalms are full of rage against enemies expressed to God to the point of rage against God himself for allowing so much anguish.
If someone were to kill one of my loved ones, I doubt that I could forgive the killer that day, the next day, and maybe not for years. But asking God to do the forgiving for me would be an act of forgiveness in itself–if I were sincere in wanting the wrongdoer forgiven.
Once some time in the most intense grief has passed, we must pray for the light and the power of forgiveness to dwell somewhere within our broken, wronged hearts. And one day we might just be able to let some grudge or even some intense hatred go and feel the sensation of the cleansing blood of forgiveness flowing in us.
Once its genuinely achieved and the rage and bitter feelings have passed enough that we can live with still hurt feelings what once seemed impossible to forgive, forgiveness opens us to the liberating sensation of the blood of Jesus flowing unimpeded within us.
But God knows it don’t come easy.
Today is Holy Thursday and that’s what this this special day the Lord hath made is about.
Let us rejoice and be glad in it.
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By George Marion McClellan
CHRIST washed the feet of Judas!
The dark and evil passions of his soul,
His secret plot, and sordidness complete,
His hate, his purposing, Christ knew the whole,
And still in love he stooped and washed his feet.
Christ washed the feet of Judas!
Yet all his lurking sin was bare to him,
His bargain with the priest, and more than this,
In Olivet, beneath the moonlight dim,
Aforehand knew and felt his treacherous kiss.
Christ washed the feet of Judas!
And so ineffable his love ’twas meet,
That pity fill his great forgiving heart,
And tenderly to wash the traitor’s feet,
Who in his Lord had basely sold his part.
Christ washed the feet of Judas!
And thus a girded servant, self-abased,
Taught that no wrong this side the gate of heaven
Was ever too great to wholly be effaced,
And though unasked, in spirit be forgiven.
And so if we have ever felt the wrong
Of Trampled rights, of caste, it matters not,
What e’er the soul has felt or suffered long,
Oh, heart! this one thing should not be forgot:
Christ washed the feet of Judas.
**The word “Maundy” comes from the Latin mandatum, which means “commandment.”
At the Last Supper, Jesus gave the disciples a new commandment to love one another as he had loved them (John 13:34). Prior to breaking the bread with the disciples, Jesus washed their feet. Maundy Thursday worship services include Holy Communion and sometimes foot washing as well.
I hope I never have to face the test of forgiving someone who has taken the life of one of my family members; that is a test of forgiveness that I don’t know if I could pass. I am amazed by those who do forgive those who have wronged them egregiously. Talk about the walking embodiment of God’s word.
I do think some people can forgive an atrocity like murder in a matter of weeks or months or even right away, but not many. It can actually be very unhealthy to force it. I’ve seen Christians who beat themselves up with guilt because they couldn’t forgive. Others proclaim to the world they forgive some mass shooter or something, only to find in time when anger sets in that can’t forgive (at least not yet). As I said, it’s a process and a tough one and it’s OK to give yourself permission to feel whatever you feel and say out loud what you feel, even if you feel hatred for the one who took a life from you. God knows it wasn’t you who took a life and God suffers with you even in the bitterness you may be suffering. That’s the beauty of the Psalms–there is a lot of bitter rage against enemies expressed, even hoping their babies heads will be “dashed against the rocks.” That’s an honest-go-God feeling if you’re suffering and grieving.
I appreciate your honest view on the fact that forgiveness isn’t simply a matter of deciding to “do it.” I would imagine it is usually an involved, lengthy process when meaningful.
I meant to say in the first sentence that not many can do it in any short amount of time, and edited it to say that.