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Archive for November, 2016

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I know what you’ve been thinking, you all of the Cult of Jitterbug.

You’ve been thinking, “Where have you our worthy leader the Jitterbugger gone at such a time as this, a time when we need your wit, wisdom, provocations and stimulations, which are capable of possibly (probably?) alienating whole towns, nations cities and states.”

I know, you must have been wallowing in angst with a hint of despair while I was away.

So would you believe I’ve been out in the jungle living off the land with nothing but my machete, my bandana, my palm-leaf Speedo and my pet howler monkey Trump?

That’s a typical day in my sexy life, of course.

However, the unfortunate fact is that my Mac laptop, which served me so well for seven years, is barely breathing now that its heart (i.e., the internal battery), is about one or two uses away from going deader than Elvis, who contrary to rumor is plenty dead.

He speaks to me and my crazy monkey from the grave some nights out in the bush.

* * *

Fortunately, I’ve been saving all my money this year for a new Mac and aim to buy one when I’m back home in Texas Our Texas (all hail the mighty state and no kneeling during the state song) later this month.

Yes, I’ll be home for Thanksgiving and then some, visiting friends and fam, working with an artiste friend who is illustrating my book (The View from Down in Poordom: Reflections on Scriptures Addressing Poverty), drinking heavily with friends bummed by the election of the Great American Howler Monkey and eating copious amounts of real, down-home Tex-Mex food made by real Mexicans.

Some of whom I assume are good people and not all rapists and drug dealers.

I’m writing to you on this sunny Belizean day from the dynamic Belizean city of Benque on the Guatamalen border, using a computer at a combination Internet Cafe, grocery store, nail salon, nail and cosmetics supply shop, and office-school supply. It’s owned and operated by an enterprising Chinese-Belizean family, who own and operate most of the supermarkets and specialty shops all over this incredibly diverse and odd little country.

Apparently the Chinese-Belizean kid operating the Internet section today likes Joan Jett music because she is blasting from a couple of big speakers. At least she sings in English. He does play some Chinese rock now and then.

IT’S LOUD IN HERE. CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW JITTERBUGGERS???

* * *

Just wanted to let you know I’m alive and well and about to flee this place for lunch at a Chinese restaurant (no kidding) next door.

I’ll be back in full blog force sometime after Thanksgiving, prepared to get this President (gag) Elect’s mind and theology right. Apparently the only scripture he knows is “An eye for an eye.”

I will fix him, that I can tell you.

Until then, keep the faith and my Howler Monkey Trump and I bid you a good day.

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